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Burglar rubs spices on sleeping victim, uses sausage as a weapon
The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying spices to one of them and striking the other with a sausage. The piece of meat used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog. "That's right, the dog ate the weapon," says a cop. (Fresno Bee)
September 8, 2008 | Permalink
Comments
Was the dog named JoJo?
Posted by: Bill | Sep 8, 2008 5:51:14 AM
"I'm covered in butter, oregano, and bread crumbs!"
Posted by: jj | Sep 8, 2008 6:16:54 AM
The article fails to mention that the victims had also been placed in a smoker before they awoke.
Posted by: elchampino | Sep 8, 2008 6:17:57 AM
Sausage attacks are a Crime?
I hope my wife doesn't find out. ; )
Posted by: trustno1 | Sep 8, 2008 6:18:12 AM
They are being charged with ADW-- Assault (with) Deadly Wiener.
Posted by: Bill | Sep 8, 2008 6:27:02 AM
it seems to me that the weapon will look pretty much the same after the dog's done with it.
..assuming the dog ain't gettin' any hot anal lovin'.
Posted by: lester | Sep 8, 2008 6:29:15 AM
Anyone else get the banner ad for 'great recipes and a chance to win' from 'Savemart Supermarkets' for this article?
I must admit, I was curious as to which spices were used, but I wasn't expecting a recipe.
Posted by: Joe | Sep 8, 2008 6:30:42 AM
the culprit was rumored to have looked like bob evans
Posted by: AngrySockMonkey | Sep 8, 2008 6:33:07 AM
no female cop would ever take a man's word it was an 8 inch sausage
Posted by: aguyntexas | Sep 8, 2008 7:38:59 AM
I wonder if the culprit was the guy I saw at the gas station beating his tantrum-throwing son with a slim-jim. True story btw.
Posted by: twerp | Sep 8, 2008 7:54:35 AM
SMART CHOICE OF WEAPONS LMAO
Posted by: | Sep 8, 2008 7:56:58 AM
Yikes, I live about 30 minutes outside of Fresno! Oddly, this was not reported in the morning news.
The report gives a whole new meaning to the expression "getting beaten with someone's meat bat" (an amusing euphamism for sex).
...I wonder what kind of sausage it was?
Posted by: Kelly | Sep 8, 2008 8:20:22 AM
twerp
Slim-Jim as in the thing you use to break into a car, or Slim-Jim as in the beef jerky sticks?
Posted by: | Sep 8, 2008 8:43:47 AM
Snausages!
Posted by: Phranqlin | Sep 8, 2008 8:51:44 AM
Is this guy Hannibal Lecter?
Posted by: Dada Supreme | Sep 8, 2008 9:01:08 AM
If the meat got eat, your case is beat!
Posted by: Sean, Torrington CT | Sep 8, 2008 9:05:07 AM
beef jerky sticks. otherwise that statement woundn't relate to this story at all.
Posted by: twerp | Sep 8, 2008 10:00:52 AM
Kelly;
Fresno, farm workers, spices on everything?
My guess is some form of Mexican chorico.
Homemade, they could be large, lean, and meaty.
Frozen, a formidable and edible weapon.
Commercially, they come with a must remove clear plastic casing.
What about the dog??
Posted by: thomas | Sep 8, 2008 10:05:04 AM
How Spicy!
Posted by: Torgo | Sep 8, 2008 10:20:44 AM
Good one, Sean!
Posted by: troschne | Sep 8, 2008 10:51:52 AM
Someone has been watching the Food Channel just a little too much.
Posted by: Sheila | Sep 8, 2008 11:51:35 AM
Go Meat! (Courtesy of Hillshire Farms commericlas)
Posted by: wish i was dancing | Sep 8, 2008 1:05:06 PM
This would never happen with vegetarians!!! :::just saying:::
Posted by: Laurie | Sep 8, 2008 6:19:24 PM
EL PERRO COMIO MI SALCHICHA
Posted by: A.V. | Sep 11, 2008 1:20:45 PM
